Today's recipes are: Artichoke 101; and Vinaigrette with capers

“Lamb is very good in a brown sauce with figs”, Lily bluebell informed me. I was quite taken aback. She is after all, only just 5 years old – I mean literally as I was at her birthday party last month. Clearly this blog has hit rock bottom if I am getting recipes from 5 year olds. Lily and Charlotte (her 3 year old sister who as yet has given me no recipes) were very excited about visiting our new baby rabbits and I said that we also have baby lambs that they could come and see. I deliberately said see and not eat, but it seems that French children know a good meal when they hear it. I also think that she has as yet not made the correlation between the cute and cuddly lambs and the delicious meal she was describing!

Joerg is one of the world’s greatest gardeners. If he leaves a tool out with a wooden handle, voila, we have a spade tree. In February, we cut back the vines at the front of the house and he stuck some of the off cuts into the ground….now we have more vines to cut back. Same with the red currant bushes. He also always plants as though we are going to be asked by WHO to supply food to all of Africa on a daily basis. My current surplus is leeks, which was preceded by winter lettuce and Swiss chard. We let one chard plant go to seed last year, let it self-seed and we get new plants coming up daily. Anyone out there have chard recipes for a desperate woman?? Anyone want any chard plants??

Today’s recipe is: Carrot Roulade/Swiss Roll
When (my darling) Em and Pikey first invited us to a murder mystery dinner, I had no idea what to expect. That no-one was to actually die, seemed fairly logical, but what then? We each received our own personal invite with the character you were to play. I was Angel Roni, the beautiful (thank you, Em!) young daughter of the deceased, and Joerg was Rocco Scarfazzi, a slightly dodgy Italian businessman. We dressed as our roles required – me in a short black dress with fishnet stockings/nylons and Joerg with his head almost shaved and in a dark suit – and hoped the whole way to their house that we wouldn’t be stopped as we looked like a hooker and her pimp!

Today's recipe is: Thai Coleslaw
Before we left America, we had lunch with friends and she had just come from a yoga class. During lunch she mentioned that she had managed to get 2 of her fat rolls into a knot during one of the yoga exercises. Well, I thought that was hilarious - improbable, but hilarious. But then……

Today's recipes are: Joerg's Breakfast Smoothie; and a Mango Smoothie
My husband has just asked me for a bowl and a pair of scissors. To some of you this may seem like a perfectly normal request, but I am married to The World’s Biggest 5 Year Old. So this question sets off the same alarm bells that sound when a 5year old asks his Mother, “Mommy, can I have a keg of dynamite and a flint.” I cautiously ask what he needs these for and he excitedly informs me that he is going to use the flint to light the keg….I mean, he is going to cut some stinging nettles, lime leaf tree shoots and other weeds to make me a smoothie for lunch. My heart sinks. My 5year old is glowing with pride. I open the windows to stop the explosion breaking the glass.